I don't trust myself.
I am utterly revolting.
X



Because I can't sleep till you're next to me (No i can't live without you no more)
Sorry song lyrics stuck in my head. Insomnia. Or actually I woke up in the middle of nothing and couldn't get back to sleep. So I got up and messed around with the template.
And I pondered the meaning of me.
To no avail as expected.

a. Insect bites from OBS fricking multiplied I swear. Double itchy too.
b. The renovated Tampines swimming complex is awesome :D
c. Haven't done any elearning.
d. School's starting in a week. Sucks big time.
e. Skip the following, it's a recount for myself incase I forget anything.
f. Am typing weirdly now. Too early in the morning I think.

Obs was fun. And tiring. And unsanitary. But still fun. :D
First day was nothing remarkable. Pitched a tent. Had horrible food. First night sleeping in a tent with Qingying, Chin, Zhidan and Yuping.
Did the high elements on the second day. Yuping was belaying for me I think. Was supposed to climb with Qingying but switched to Aaron halfway. Damn scary being up there but the view was good :D Danica accidentially let go of the rope when she was belaying Jasper and he fell the remaining distance to the ground. Ouch max.
Learnt to kayak after that. Capsize drill. Hahah the guys capsized thrice. Very amusing. Then again it's not easy to kayak. Started the expedition to kekek (if i'm not mistaken). Shared a kayak with chin and christopher. Hahah it was damn gay in the beginning hahahahah had loads of trouble rafting with the others. Got the hang of it after a while. Pretty fun hahah I saw a crab!!!! and started trying to poke random bits of flotsam with my paddle hahahaahah oh and I kept going big rock big rock ahhhhh then it progressed to even bigger rock and to HUGE ROCK!!! or smth like that haahhah. There srsly were evil looking rocks omg we went so close to one yknow damn scary hahah. Poked fun at chin and her terminology hahaha "Right paddle right paddle!" "No it's right sweep!" I think we did lots of fun random stuff on the way haha but I can't rmbr anything in particular. K so at kekek we pitched a tent and had plain instant noodles for dinner. Spammed insect repellent and deodorant. Briefing on the following days' expedition then retreated back to the tent to sleep. Woke up at 3:30 for the guard duty (spent it looking at stars and refilling water bottles). The stars at pulau ubin are pretty. On the last night the instructor taught us how to find scorpio :D so coolllllllll hahaha.
Next morning there was some fiasco about cleaning up the area. Hahaahh kinda gross to type it out here. Started the kayaking expedition again. Turned into a mangrove swamp! :D hahah before turning into the river-swamp-thing there were some waves hahah so we kinda bobbed up and down with them. Damn fun :D K then kayaked through the swamp. Did a land crossing (I forgot the term). Distinctly rmbr being stuck in the mud. And Christopher making some smart comment about my mismatching shoes (one was much muddier than the other). And some random crap about mudbaths being great for the skin hahah :D Started kayaking again and got stuck in one of those mangrove trees D: HAHAH Eunice and elton keep getting stuck hahahah it was super hilarious hahahahahah there were twigs in eunice's hair after that HAAHHAHA. Everytime they got stuck someone would shout Good game or GG hahah funny max. At one point we crashed into mangrove trees so much I/we were damn scared of them haha. Oh and we drifted with the kayak xD you know the initial-D kinda drift. And I finally learnt how to backpaddle. And Christopher thought the Limbo was actually the macarena so everytime we looked like we were gna crash he'd be all do the macarena again or smth hahah until I corrected him (while laughing like crazy). Then someone dropped the map into the swamp haha. 海底捞图. Good game hahah. After a while our kayak was getting very dirty because of all the crashes and mud from land crossings ._. Then we capsized. Not accidentially (Christopher claimed) though haha. We wanted to "clean the kayak". HAHAHHAHA damn funny christopher kept showing off our literally squeaky clean kayak after that and telling everyone we capsized to clean the kayak. Anw we lost a 1.5l bottle of water, a few caps, and some earsticks. Maybe lost some happy oranges too. After capsizing we zihighed like crazy hahahaha. Made it to the second campsite and waited for the speedboat with our bags to arrive. Bags and everything were soaked because they apparently fell into the sea or smth so the boat took longer to come. Major grossness k EVERYTHING was soaked. Clothes food tents. Camera died (never to be revived) D: At least OBS is refunding. That night was the worst. Second night of not bathing (imagine how gross we were) and covered in gravel and salt. Soaked to the skin, tents also dripping wet. Had more instant noodles for dinner then the guys started experimenting with prickly heat. HAHAHA DAMN FUNNY HAHAHAHA. Tried Elton's superstrong counterpain. Felt damn good plz, muscles were aching from hours of kayaking. Danica applied too much hahahah xD Sat at the shore with eunice looking across the sea at singapore and wishing we were there. Started catching planes (to wish for a better life at obs haha). Started consolidating the number of planes we caught so we could get the wish faster. In the end I lost count at around 40 or smth :X That night was horrible. Danica was shivering like crazy. Tent was sandy and wet. Could barely move from muscle aches when we woke up. Woke up many times in the night too D: I think we kayaked more than 10 hours in two days.
Set off hiking the next morning with the superheavy backpack. Hiking was gruelling srsly. Oh but the view from the highest point in the island was awesome. Hahah shouted stuff like go home and bathe. Echoed back :D We were half dead when we made it back to base camp. Srsly. 10+ km with a super heavy bag D: Pitched tents then finally bathed. Bathing was like our source of motivation throughout the hike. Celebratory dinner. Fried rice was good :D Didn't eat much else. Had some sandfly infestation in some tents but ours was spared. Slept very soundly. Was either too tired or alr used to gross surroundings. Next morning was cleaning up and Eunice stole a lot of oranges, the pervert -_- then some hit the bell thing which I do not want to think about in detail. And home-home. Finally. But it was kinda sad leaving the place. We were so fascinated with all the high rises and sbs buses and hdb flats when we got back to the mainland :X Haven't seen much but trees and the sea for too long. Went subway with chin danica and eunice after that :D Had a lot of fun thinking about stuff that happened in obs. It felt damn good to be at home that night. Quite an experience and I think I boringified it alr but nvm :D May go again in JC if i get the chance.

Am going back to sleep in a proper bed with proper aircon with proper blankets and pillows and stuffed toys! :D
X



BACK FROM OBS! :D
X



Leaving for OBS :D
hope it'll be fun :D

Goodbye civilisation. Will be back in five days. In one piece I hope.
X



Middle of packing for OBS. Hate packing for camps, never know what bag to bring (bags never big enough). Am gna drown precamp blues in a cup of cup C flavoured frolick (with marshmallows and smth else) tmr evening and enjoy my last night of proper beds and running water.

Also listening to the (professional) recordings of my exam pieces and feeling miserable. I didn't know my playing was that bad srsly -_- Even my best song sounds amuterish next to the recording. Sad max ):

Plz don't die in obs plz plz plz.
X



I just realised (after making a few phone calls) that my connection is the only one not working ._. Blogger.com is the only website I can access now. I have no idea why actually, kinda dumb but beggars can't be choosers. Mio repair person coming only on Monday and that's stupid because I'll be at OBS on monday. And I finished Handle with Care alr. DAMN SAD SHE DIED IN THE END WLAOOOOO I WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO A HAPPY ENDING ): I think I will suffer from withdrawal symptoms soon. Never knew I was such an internet junkie actually. And the extra classes (that I'd have gotten to skip cos of OBS) are cancelled, damn sad. But at least I won't have extra stuff to catch up on :D Imagine missing amath/bio/chem/history lessons for a week. That's a lot of work :/

Watched the hannah montana/montannah/montanna movie today with mel (cos project + class bbq was cancelled). We are now the ultimate sellouts hahahha. The movie was damn good :D There's this damnnn hot + cute guy hahahhahha eyecandy max. He and miley got together in the end but he's. so. cute. zomg. If i had working internet I'd google his picture but no liying has no access to websites other than blogger (still puzzles me).
Oh ya hairy remind me to show you one of the neoprints we took tday we rmbered you hahahahah :D

Was looking through my nostalgia box(es) just now. Hahah I think I almost cried. Have notes saved from secondary 1. Damn sweet to know you all cared :) Very very very nostalgic hhahaha. Eh debby if you read this rmbr the time you took your shoes off to dry during class (I think we were running in the rain after PE again hahah). And you wrote smth like BORED to the KOR. HAHAHAH GEDDIT NOT GEDDIT NOT :D Lol the pun's damn evil hahahah. Ms Kor very poor thing la haha :X then the click five came up with a jenny song somemore xD
Have lots of other random debris ranging from brastraps to guitar picks (my first guitar pick which I later broke hahaha) to guitar strings (my first set also :D) to tags (from the aids run ages ago) to straw hearts and smses saved on scraps of paper (i miss you... only a little). And Vday notes along the lines of stop attracting ants (CHNG) and photos from my primary/lower sec days. Added the student camp group photo also :)

*newsflash* I think I can read some blogspots!!! HAHAHAHAH YES AWESHUM FIRST SMALL STEP TO REGAINING FULL USAGE OF INTERNET! :DDDDDDDDDDD (shit, why can't I log into msn or read livejournals) Eh I can google also. WHY CAN'T I LIVEJOURNAL??????? Damn I can't read fml also. ): FML.

You know what (no).

okay this gna be corny. skip this.

Life is an uphill battle. (the climb, from the hannah montana soundtrack :X)

Things aren't as simple as they appear to be. People you meet are like the waves breaking on sand. There a moment. Gone before you know it. Some make a greater impact than others. Some wash further inshore. Some destroy your sandcastles, some bring random bits of flotsam with them. Some wash your life's work away. They all impact on you. You change because of the constant erosion of the moving water (whee I sound like a geog student). You are moulded by the people you meet (and the things you go through).
You are the only person you can depend on. Waves aren't permanent. We are fickle beings. Change is the only constant.

and everything happens for a reason.

I feel so ._.
Bye. I am now bored of posting too.
X



Do you know how useless I feel. Sad life. Sad world.
How can you love me so much even though I find myself so despicable? I am revolting.
Why do we live?

Internet connection srsly wonky. Can't log into messenger. Can't access email. Websites like eons to load. Wtf is this. Mio sucks balls.
Ok at least I can still access blogger :/

P.s I have never hated anything as much as math. (especially after amath tuition.)
Damn the bastard who invented amath. Am always a major grouch after amath tuition.
X



Something very wrong with internet recently. Don't know when I'll be able to connect again. I hope the sun comes out. Homework week sucks ):


X



student camp 09/哈K 46.3/海底椰/孙燕姿

Was quite an experience although it was a little awkward. May return next year if I find more people to go with me. Feels funny being back at home. No more hostel food at canteen tables. And horrible school toilets. No more running around under the hot sun doing nothing much. No more getting high and jumping around. Lying on the slope up to the church watching stars was nice :D
I didn't know I liked camp that much actually.

Am now catching up on lives. Facing off with schoolwork. Trying to find a meaning to life. Pretending not to think. The usual.

Who am I?

(Liying you loser.)
X



Hahah bye. Take care too. :)

We think about it, sing about it, dream about it,lose sleep worrying about it. When we don't have it; we search for it; when we discover it; we don't know what to do with it; when we have it; we fear losing it. It is the constant source of pleasure and pain. But we can't predict which it will be from one moment to the next. It is a short word, easy to spell, difficult to define, impossible to live without.

X



Amath has this amazing ability to cause temporary (or not) brain damage. H8 math ):
Student camp tmr. Scary maxxxx idk what to expect ._. Still upset about fbts.

you know what, that made sense.

Bye. Am suffering from a paralysed brain thanks to amath. Can't think of what to say.
X



Piying got bangs. HAHAHAHA EPIC. You should see the msn conversation.
Helping out at the basketball thing wasn't that bad. Ended up slacking around watching matches with Jo's friends + chin, yy, and ivy. Hahah made new acquaintances. Was fun except for the food. Chilli fishballs are gross. I didn't bring the gross PE pants so mr tong let the LOs wear skirts. Pwn :D

Yesterday was pretty fun haha. I figured out how to curl hair alr okay woman. (my) curls look like crap on my hair hahah too frizzy ):
And hair straighteners only straighten out my ends. No silky hair like when you get straightening done at a salon. ):
I want nice hair.

Student camp soon. Don't know many people in the group xcept for the guitarians. Ray says they're her classmates. Plz no icebreaker games plz plz plz I h8 icebreaker games especially dog & bone omg that's the worst plzzzz plz plz argh. At least there's the angel-mortal games hahah cute max! :D (but we can't wear fbts. Lucky ivy's not gg or she'll kick up a huuuuge fuss haahahah)

Sigh am still very sad about chiang rai. We should be coming back tday ):
Chiang raaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiii.

OH I GOT MR. HAPPY FROM THE 7-11 THING ALR TEEHEE AHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAHAHA SO. HAPPY. :D

I wna go candy empire.

From jo's blog. July 07 archives hahaah.

Yay!!! Today's dance was great,and we got 2nd..yay!!! Warm up music was canon groove...lol.The song rawks la.We got this really BIG and HEAVY basket full of goodies(yippee!)
and I shook Dr Boon's hand..cool..hahas..After the dance,we took some pictures and er..sprayed each other's hair with purple hair spray.It was a nightmarish experience lo..Brandon tried to spray me but distance too far liao so no use,hahas..Then,deb-chan,meow and pi-chan chasing the boys to spray their hair..super funny..hahahahas..In the end,brandon and ling xian's hair kena one dark patch of purple..hahahahas..:)The gals looked like "lao wu po" after spraying their hair,lol.Went to Whitesands the Macs to 'celebrate',a lot of people were kind of staring at us.. Hmmph! So rude! hahas..One of deb's fries have this weird shade of green,meow said it was algae,I said it was wasabi..hahas.. :) Then,ah bu like emo-ing while playing pokemon..so I told superman to er...cheer him up a bit la..quite funny coz ling xian was waving the bbq sauce and mayo in front of ah bu's face..before deciding to use the straw and somehow the straw part well...*rolls on floor laughing hysterically* it's seriously super funny la.Meow and I should be the first ever people in history to die laughing.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHA

HA.

:)

X




Notice how the people and position hasn't changed haha. Other than that so much has changed. Two years is quite a considerable amount of time.
This was damn long ago, after the cross-country. I miss going to the beach like we did so often in sec 1 :D Those were the days.
Hahah Piying Deb Ky hear that not. *wiggles eyebrows* Major hint dropping.
I think the first few new friends I made in AHS are Jo/Deb/Xiu cos I was moved over from beside Melissa to where they were sitting. HAHAAH AND I RMBR HOW THEY USED TO THINK I WAS LESBO. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH ok pretty funny. And how xiu used to terrorize me -_-
I still have the noob firecracker story we did. Xiu Ying wtf hahah.

I can't sleep. Think I woke up in the middle of a dream. Or maybe I woke up thinking I was still dreaming.
Either way I'm pretty screwed, have to reach school at 7:30 in the morning later. A sunday.

Am sending pictures over from Clara's exphone (previously temporarily my phone). Hahah yes clara you getting your phone back. Suffered enough in my hands. Am back to using the old Samsung I thought I got rid of .____.
Spaceballs. I miss the sony phone :/ Thought I didn't really like it but I guess I -secretly- did D:
Argh why do we only realise how much something means to us only after we lose it.

I think I'm typing weird now, eyelids feel funny but I can't seem to fall asleep. Hahah twilight: I like watching you sleep. The movie wasn't that bad actually. I just couldn't get over the fact that they were all. so. white. ._. Sunny Singapore I luv U.

I shall go back to wallowing in indecision while reading Jodi Picoult's handle with care. Pray later won't turn out to be a complete disaster. Resident pessimist speaking here.

I feel like playing tap tap now. Hahahah tap tap 1 pwns.
I should be in Chiang Rai now.
X





edit/

1. Am now regretting letting claire talk me into going for student camp.
2. Also semi-regretting volunteering for AYG. Who brings their own team around their own school huh damn gay plz ._.
3. Keeping fingers crossed for OBS groupings.
4. Have. No. Time.
X



I am fucking sick of this.
I no longer believe.
X





From ages ago at chung cheng (the trashy debate thing I regret not skipping)
We were very amused by the ___________. (:X)
Felt like the sec2 immersion programme again hahah but their school grounds are very big and chio unlike ahs ._.

Intensive chem with Ray later and it's only the second day of the holidays -_-
What crap is this plz. The talk with the tchers didn't go down too well with my mom :/
It amazes me how much someone can talk even when the other party is obviously not listening. Or responding.

Was quite sunburnt from cycling yesterday. Horrible muscle aches also. But it was quite fun anw and the burn's less visible tday. Going ecp again soon :)


Days are packed but somehow there's an abysmal emptiness inside.
X